Motivational Video – Advice From The Biggest Successful People


Here’s a powerful one hour video with the best advice from highly successful people. A must see for all entrepreneurs.

THE GIANTS ADVICE – Motivational Video – Advice from the biggest successful people – Speeches 2017

Speakers:


Lewis Howes,
Steven Spielberg,
Tony Robbins,
Gary Vaynerchiuk ,
Robin Williams,
Mel Robbins,
William H. Mcraven,
Simon Sinek,
David Goggins,
Jim Carrey,
Martin Luther King Jr. &
Serena Williams.

Transcripts of the Video:

00:00
so how do you get rich without without
00:03
going to school I think you gotta have a
00:04
dream first you know for me it always
00:06
starts with a dream because I can get I
00:09
can go through any adversity when I have
00:11
a dream something I’m passionate about
00:13
when I’m not excited about something
00:15
then I want to give up or I don’t want
00:17
to do it I want to go back to thinking
00:18
about my dream right and so I think
00:20
first we have to figure out what is our
00:22
dream and go on a journey in a path to
00:24
achieving that when you have a dream it
00:28
doesn’t often come at you screaming in
00:30
your face this is who you are this is
00:34
what you must be for the rest of your
00:35
life sometimes a dream almost whispers
00:38
and I’ve always said to my kids the
00:41
hardest thing to listen to your
00:43
instincts your human personal intuition
00:47
always whispers it never shouts very
00:50
hard to hear so you have to every day of
00:53
your lives be ready to hear what
00:55
whispers in your ear it very rarely
00:58
shouts and if you can listen to the
01:00
whisper and if it tickles your heart and
01:03
it’s something you think you want to do
01:05
for the rest of your life then that is
01:07
going to be what you do for the rest of
01:09
your lives and we will benefit from
01:10
everything you do everything you people
01:14
have told me I didn’t have the
01:15
technology I’d have the right contacts I
01:17
didn’t have the time I didn’t have money
01:18
everything you’ve told me I didn’t have
01:20
enough Supreme Court justices those are
01:22
resources and so you’re telling me I
01:25
fail because I didn’t have the resources
01:26
and I’m here to tell you what you
01:28
already know resources are never the
01:30
problem it’s a lack of resourcefulness
01:33
because the ultimate resources are
01:37
emotional states creativity decisiveness
01:40
passion honesty sincerity love these are
01:45
the ultimate human resources and when
01:47
you engage these resource you can get
01:49
any other resource on earth
01:52
resourcefulness is the ultimate resource
01:54
and if you don’t have what you want stop
01:57
telling yourself a story you can get all
01:59
the money all the time
02:00
that’s bullshit it’s because you haven’t
02:02
committed yourself where you could burn
02:04
your boats if you want to take the
02:06
fucking island burn your fucking boats
02:08
and you will take the otic because
02:09
people when they’re gonna either die or
02:10
succeed tend to succeed the biggest
02:14
poison in us is regret it’s poison and I
02:21
push so hard so hard and we’ll through
02:24
my vehicle which is a meditation which
02:28
isn’t health and wellness which is a
02:30
non-profit my vehicles business I can’t
02:33
help it it’s what I love I love building
02:36
businesses I love competing with you I
02:37
want to beat you I love that game but
02:40
through that vehicle I will always push
02:42
a lack of regret and awareness to how
02:46
good it really is you’re more than
02:47
welcome to tell me about how bad it is
02:49
or why you can’t because or what but
02:53
it’s just not true because if anybody
02:55
ever did it then you can do stop making
03:00
excuses stop complaining
03:02
nobody’s listening they made me pretend
03:05
they’re listening the market doesn’t
03:08
care what you need to do is make one
03:11
person happy you then you can make
03:14
everybody else happy you know why I like
03:16
making people happy because I’m already
03:17
happy and so I implore you to take this
03:22
last little rant and really look at your
03:23
fucking face and understand are you
03:26
doing the things that are putting you in
03:27
a position to succeed not just in a
03:30
business world but in life because it’s
03:32
super important biggest boy when you’re
03:34
happy in life your fuckin business can
03:36
roll and so I’m
03:38
trying to figure it out and I’ve been
03:41
trying to figure it out in front of you
03:42
for the last seven eight years trying to
03:44
figure out the unlocks EQ IQ
03:47
self-awareness hustle I don’t know what
03:49
they are you know why cuz like I told my
03:51
man it’s three hundred thirty different
03:53
unlocks and so I’ll go to all of them
03:56
they’re all tried and true and one might
03:58
hit you yeah it was hard work cuz I’m
04:00
actually lazy I talk a good game but I’m
04:02
full of shit or it might be something
04:05
else but fuck one and so you just let it
04:14
sit you’re into this right good shit
04:18
you’re gonna remember this good one
04:22
fucking life one life my friends one
04:25
time and honestly I’ll leave you with
04:27
this because a lot of you need it how
04:30
you make your money is more important
04:34
than how much you make you know as we
04:38
come to the end of this phase of our
04:40
life we find ourselves trying to
04:44
remember the good times and trying to
04:48
forget the bad times we find ourselves
04:51
thinking about the future we start to
04:55
worry thinking what am I gonna do
05:00
where am I gonna be in ten years
05:03
[Music]
05:05
but I say to you hey look at me
05:12
please don’t worry so much because in
05:16
the end none of us have very long on
05:19
this earth life is fleeting
05:28
and if you ever distressed cast your
05:34
eyes to the summer sky
05:37
when the stars are strung across the
05:39
velvety night
05:41
when a shooting star streaks through the
05:44
blackness turning night and today
05:47
[Music]
05:49
make-a-wish
05:53
think of me
05:57
make your life spectacular I know I did
06:06
[Music]
06:12
I have yet to give a speech or have a
06:15
meeting where somebody doesn’t ask me
06:16
the Millenial question what’s the
06:19
Millenial question apparently
06:21
Millennials as a generation which is a
06:22
group of people who were born
06:23
approximately 1984 and after are tough
06:31
to manage and they’re accused of being
06:33
entitled and narcissistic and
06:36
self-interested unfocused lazy but
06:42
entitled is the big one and and because
06:46
they confound leadership so much what’s
06:49
happening as leaders are asking the
06:50
Millennials what do you want and
06:52
Millennials are saying we want to work
06:54
in a place with purpose love that we
06:58
want to make an impact you know whatever
06:59
that means we want free food and bean
07:04
bags and so somebody articulates some
07:09
sort of purpose there’s lots of free
07:11
food and there’s bean bags and yet for
07:13
some reason they’re still not happy and
07:15
that’s because you that they’re missing
07:20
this there’s a there’s a missing piece
07:21
what I’ve learned is that there I can
07:25
break it down into four pieces right
07:26
there are four four things four
07:28
characteristics one is parenting the
07:30
other one is technology
07:32
the third is impatience and the fourth
07:33
is environment the generation that we
07:36
call the Millennials too many of them
07:38
grew up subject to not my words failed
07:44
parenting strategies you know where for
07:48
example they were told that they were
07:49
special all the time they were told that
07:52
they have anything they want in life
07:53
just cuz they want it they were told
07:58
some of them got into honors classes not
08:01
because they deserved it but because
08:02
their parents complained and some of
08:03
them got a is not because they earned
08:04
them but because the teachers didn’t
08:06
want to deal with the parents some kids
08:08
got participation medals they got a
08:10
medal for coming in last right which the
08:13
science we know is pretty clear which is
08:15
it devalues the metal and the reward for
08:17
those who actually work hard and that
08:18
actually makes the person who comes in
08:20
last to feel embarrassed because they
08:22
know they didn’t deserve it so that
08:23
makes me feel worse
08:24
right so you take this group of people
08:26
and they graduate school and they get a
08:28
job and they’re thrust into an it into
08:30
the real world and in an instant they
08:31
find out they’re not special
08:33
their moms can’t get them a promotion
08:35
that you get nothing for coming in last
08:37
and by the way you can’t just have it
08:39
because you want it right and in an
08:40
instant their entire self-image is
08:42
shattered and so you have an entire
08:43
generation that’s growing up with lower
08:45
self-esteem than previous generations
08:46
the other problem to compound it is
08:48
we’re growing up in a facebook Instagram
08:50
world in other words we’re good at
08:52
putting filters on things we’re good at
08:54
showing people that life is amazing even
08:56
though I’m depressed right and so
08:59
everybody sounds tough
09:00
and everybody sounds like they got it
09:01
all figure it out and the reality is
09:03
there’s very little toughness and most
09:04
people don’t have it figure it out and
09:05
so when the more senior people say what
09:08
we do they sound like this is what you
09:09
got at it and they have no clue so you
09:16
have an entire generation growing up
09:18
with lower self-esteem than previous
09:19
generations right through no fault of
09:22
their own through no fault of their own
09:23
right they were dealt a bad hand right
09:26
now let’s add in technology we know that
09:30
engagement with social media and our
09:33
cell phones releases a chemical called
09:35
dopamine that’s why when you get a text
09:37
feels good all right so you know we’ve
09:40
all had it where you’re feeling a little
09:40
bit down appealing a bit lonely and so
09:42
you send out ten texts to ten friends
09:44
you know high high high high high
09:47
because it feels good when you get a
09:48
response right right it’s why we count
09:52
the likes it’s why we go back ten times
09:54
to see if and if it’s going if our means
09:56
and my Instagram is growing slower I
09:58
would I do something wrong do they not
10:00
like me anymore right the trauma for
10:02
young kids to be unfriended right
10:05
because we know when you get it you get
10:07
a hit a dopamine which feels good it’s
10:08
why we like it it’s why we keep going
10:10
back to it
10:10
dopamine is the exact same chemical that
10:13
makes us feel good when we smoke when we
10:15
drink and when we gamble in other words
10:18
it’s highly highly addictive right we
10:23
have age restrictions on smoking
10:25
gambling and alcohol and we have no age
10:29
restrictions on social media and cell
10:31
phones which is the equivalent of
10:32
opening up the liquor cabinet and saying
10:34
to our teenagers hey by the way this
10:36
adolescence thing if it gets you down
10:39
but that’s basically what’s happening
10:41
that’s basically what’s happening right
10:43
that’s basically what happened you have
10:44
an entire generation that has access to
10:46
an addictive numbing chemical called
10:49
dopamine through social media and
10:50
cellphones as they’re going through the
10:51
high stress of adolescence why is this
10:54
important
10:54
almost every alcoholic discovered
10:57
alcohol when they were teenagers when
11:00
we’re very very young the only approval
11:01
we need is the approval of our parents
11:03
and as we go through adolescence we make
11:05
this transition where we now need the
11:07
approval of our peers very frustrating
11:10
for our parents very important for us
11:11
that allows us to acculturate outside of
11:13
our immediate families into the broader
11:15
tribe right
11:16
it’s a highly highly stressful and
11:18
anxious period of our lives and we’re
11:19
supposed to learn to rely on our friends
11:23
some people quite by accident discover
11:25
alcohol and numbing effects of dopamine
11:27
to help them cope with the stresses and
11:30
anxieties of adolescents unfortunately
11:33
that becomes hardwired in their brains
11:34
and for the rest of their lives when
11:36
they suffer significant stress they will
11:37
not turn to a person they will turn to
11:39
the bottle social stress financial
11:41
stress career stress that’s pretty much
11:43
the primary reasons why an alcoholic
11:45
drinks right what’s happening is because
11:48
we’re allowing unfettered access to
11:49
these dopamine producing devices and
11:52
media basically it’s becoming hardwired
11:54
and what we’re seeing is as they grow
11:55
older they – many kids don’t know how to
11:59
form deep meaningful relationships their
12:01
words not mine they will admit that many
12:04
of their friendships are superficial
12:05
they will admit that their friends that
12:08
they don’t count on their friends they
12:09
don’t rely on their friends they have
12:10
fun with their friends but they also
12:12
know that their friends will cancel on
12:14
them as something better comes along
12:15
deep meaningful relationships are not
12:16
there because they never practice the
12:18
skill set and worse they don’t have the
12:20
coping mechanisms to deal with stress so
12:22
when significant stress starts to show
12:24
up in their lives they’re not turning to
12:26
a person they’re turning to a device
12:28
they’re turning to social media they’re
12:30
turning to these things which offer
12:31
temporary relief we know the science is
12:34
clear we know that people who spend more
12:36
time on Facebook so far higher rates of
12:37
depression than people who spend less
12:38
time on Facebook write these things
12:41
balanced alcohol is not bad too much
12:43
alcohol is bad gambling is fun too much
12:45
gambling is dangerous right there’s
12:47
nothing wrong with social media and cell
12:49
phones it’s the imbalance right if
12:51
you’re
12:52
at dinner with your friends and you’re
12:54
texting somebody who’s not there that’s
12:58
a problem that’s an addiction if you’re
13:00
sitting in a meeting with people you’re
13:02
supposed to be listening to and speaking
13:03
and you put your phone on the table face
13:06
up or face down I don’t care
13:08
that sends a subconscious message to the
13:10
room that you’re not just you’re just
13:11
not that important to me right now
13:13
right that’s what happens and the fact
13:15
that you cannot put it away it’s because
13:16
you are addicted right if you wake up
13:18
and you check your phone before you say
13:20
good morning to your girlfriend
13:21
boyfriend or spouse you have an
13:23
addiction and like all addiction in time
13:25
it’ll destroy relationships it’ll cost
13:27
time and it’ll cost money and it’ll make
13:29
your life worse right so you have a
13:33
generation growing up and lower
13:34
self-esteem that doesn’t have the coping
13:36
mechanisms to do with strace stress
13:37
right now you add in the sense of
13:39
impatience right they’ve grown up in a
13:41
world of instant gratification you want
13:43
to buy something you go on Amazon it
13:44
arrives the next day you want to watch a
13:46
movie log on and watch your movie you
13:47
don’t check movie times you want to
13:49
watch your TV show binge you don’t even
13:50
have to wait week to week to week right
13:53
I know people who skip seasons just so
13:55
they can binge at the end of the season
13:57
right instant gratification you want to
14:02
go on a date you don’t even have to
14:03
learn how to be like you don’t even have
14:10
to learn and practice that skill you
14:12
don’t have to be the uncomfortable and
14:13
what’s this is yes when you mean knowns
14:14
there’s no one you mean no mean yes when
14:16
you you have to swipe right bang I’m a
14:18
stud right you don’t have to learn the
14:23
social coping mechanisms right
14:25
everything you want you can have
14:26
instantaneously everything you want
14:29
instant gratification except job
14:32
satisfaction and strength of
14:34
relationships
14:35
there ain’t no app for that they are
14:37
slow meandering uncomfortable messy
14:40
processes and so I keep meeting these
14:43
wonderful fantastic idealistic
14:45
hard-working smart kids they’ve just
14:47
graduated school they’re in their
14:49
entry-level job I sit down with them
14:50
when I go how’s it going they go I think
14:52
I’m gonna quit I’m like why they’re like
14:55
I’m not making an impact I’m like you’ve
14:58
been here eight months it’s as if
15:02
they’re standing at the foot of a
15:03
mountain and they have this abstract
15:05
concept called impact that they want to
15:06
have in the world which is the summit
15:08
what they don’t see is the mountain I
15:10
don’t care if you go up the mountain
15:12
quickly or slowly but there’s still a
15:14
mountain and so what this young
15:16
generation needs to learn is patience
15:18
that some things that really really
15:20
matter like love or job fulfillment joy
15:26
love of life self-confidence a skill set
15:30
any of these things all of these things
15:32
take time
15:33
sometimes you can expedite pieces of it
15:36
but the overall journey is arduous and
15:40
long and difficult and if you don’t ask
15:42
for help and learn that skill set you
15:44
will fall off the mountain or you will
15:46
the worst case scenario the worst case
15:48
scenario and we’re already seeing it the
15:50
worst case scenario is we’re seeing
15:52
increase in suicide rates we’re seeing
15:54
an increase in this generation we’re
15:55
seeing increase in accidental deaths due
15:57
to drug overdoses we’re seeing more and
15:59
more kids drop out of school or take
16:00
leaves of absence due to depression
16:03
unheard of these are this is this is
16:06
really bad the best-case scenario the
16:09
bet those are all bad cases right the
16:12
best case scenario is you’ll have an
16:14
entire population growing up and going
16:16
through life and just never really
16:17
finding joy they’ll never really find
16:20
deep deep fulfillment in work or in life
16:23
they’ll just just walk through life in
16:26
little G just it’s fine how’s your job
16:29
it’s fine the same is yesterday how’s
16:32
your relationship it’s fine like that’s
16:34
that’s the best-case scenario which
16:36
leads me to the the fourth point which
16:38
is environment which is we’re taking
16:39
this amazing group of young fantastic
16:43
kids were just dealt a bad hand it’s no
16:45
fault of their own and we put them in
16:47
corporate environments that care more
16:49
about the numbers and they do about the
16:51
kids they care more about the short-term
16:53
gains than the long-term life of this
16:56
young human being we care more about the
16:59
year than the lifetime right and so we
17:03
are putting them in corporate
17:04
environments that aren’t helping them
17:06
build their confidence that aren’t
17:07
helping them learn the skills of
17:09
cooperation that aren’t helping them
17:11
overcome the challenges of a digital
17:13
world in finding more
17:15
that isn’t helping them overcome the
17:19
need to have instant gratification and
17:21
teach them the joys and impact and the
17:23
fulfillment you get from working hard
17:26
over on something for a long time that
17:28
cannot be done in a month or even in a
17:30
year and so with thrusting to them them
17:33
in corporate environments in the worst
17:34
part about it is they think it’s them
17:35
they blame themselves they can’t they
17:38
think it’s them who can’t deal and so it
17:40
makes it all worse it’s not I’m here to
17:42
tell them it’s not them it’s the
17:44
corporation’s it’s the corporate
17:45
environments it’s the total lack of good
17:48
leadership in our world today that is
17:50
making them feel the way they do they
17:53
would dealt a bad hand in its and I hate
17:55
to say it but it’s the company’s
17:56
responsibility
17:57
sucks to be you like we have no choice
17:59
right this is what we got and I wish
18:02
that society and their parents did a
18:03
better job they didn’t so we’re gonna
18:05
we’re getting them in our companies and
18:07
we now have to pick up the slack we have
18:09
to work extra hard to figure out the
18:11
ways that we build their confidence we
18:13
have to work extra hard to find ways to
18:16
teach them social the social skills that
18:18
they’re missing out on
18:19
there should be no cell phones and
18:21
conference rooms none zero and I don’t
18:24
mean the kind of like sitting outside
18:26
waiting to text I mean like when you’re
18:28
sitting and waiting for a meeting to
18:29
start nobody go this is what we all do
18:31
we all sit here and wait for the meeting
18:32
to start meaning starting okay when we
18:34
start the meeting no that’s not how
18:36
relationships are formed remember we
18:37
talked about it’s the little things
18:38
relationships are formed this way we’re
18:40
waiting for a meeting to start we go
18:42
how’s your dad I heard he’s in hospital
18:44
oh he’s really good thanks for asking
18:46
he’s actually at home now oh I’m really
18:48
glad that was really amazing I know it
18:49
was really scary for that’s how you form
18:52
relationships hey did you ever get that
18:54
report on oh my god no I didn’t I love
18:56
you I totally uh can I help you out with
18:58
that
18:58
really that’s how trust forms trust
19:01
doesn’t form at an event in a day even
19:04
bad times don’t form trust immediately
19:06
it’s the slow steady consistency and we
19:11
have to create mechanisms where we allow
19:13
for those little innocuous interactions
19:16
to happen but when we allow cell phones
19:17
and company just okay I have the meeting
19:20
and then my favorite is like when
19:22
there’s a cell phone there and you go
19:23
like this you go
19:26
it rings and go I’m not gonna answer
19:31
that mr. magnanimous you know when
19:37
you’re out for dinner with your friends
19:38
like I I do this with my friends when
19:41
we’re going out for dinner and we’re
19:42
leaving together
19:43
we’ll leave our cellphones at home who
19:46
we call him maybe one of us will bring
19:47
the phone in case we need to call an
19:49
uber or take a picture of our meal I’m
19:57
an idealist but I’m not insane I mean it
20:01
looked really good
20:03
we’ll take one phone and so it’s like an
20:07
alcoholic the reason you take the
20:08
alcohol out of the house is because we
20:10
cannot trust our willpower we’re just
20:12
not strong enough but when you remove
20:13
the temptation it actually makes it a
20:16
lot easier and so when you just say
20:18
don’t check your phone people literally
20:19
will go like this and somebody will go
20:20
to the bathroom and what’s the first
20:21
thing we do because I wouldn’t want to
20:25
look around the restroom for a minute
20:26
and a half you know but if you don’t
20:27
have the phone you just kind of enjoy
20:30
the world and that’s where ideas happen
20:33
the constant constant constant agent is
20:35
not where you have innovation and ideas
20:37
ideas happen when our minds wander and
20:39
we go and you see something uh I think
20:41
they could do that that’s called
20:43
innovation right but we’re taking away
20:45
all those little moments right
20:47
you should not and none of us none of us
20:49
should charge our phones by our beds we
20:51
should be charging our phones in the
20:52
living rooms right remove the temptation
20:54
you wake up in the middle of night cuz
20:55
you can’t sleep you won’t check your
20:57
phone which makes it worse but if it’s
20:59
in the living room it’s relaxed it’s
21:02
fine
21:03
oh yeah but it’s my alarm clock by an
21:06
alarm clock
21:07
they cost eight dollars
21:10
I’ll buy you a lot right but the point
21:14
is the point is is we now in industry
21:17
whether we like it or not we don’t get a
21:19
choice we now have a responsibility to
21:21
make up the shortfall and to help this
21:24
amazing idealistic fantastic generation
21:27
build their confidence learn patience
21:29
learn the social skills find a better
21:32
balance between life and technology
21:34
because quite frankly it’s it’s the
21:37
right thing to do thank you my pleasure
21:40
coming on well thanks for having me
21:42
thank you for coming incredible
21:45
absolutely amazing where can they find
21:48
you so ironic isn’t it
21:51
well you can find me in social media
21:54
when you’re not in the meeting so so so
21:57
yeah I’m in all the usual places but um
21:59
but I will tell you one thing so I have
22:01
a new book coming out in in September
22:04
this is it’s it’s a thinly veiled plug
22:06
but the what just made them very happy
22:09
but what’s special about it is I wanted
22:10
to produce something that that no
22:14
digital format could reproduce and so
22:18
it’s an illustrated quote book it’s it’s
22:21
beautifully illustrated I was very sort
22:23
of pushy about this that I didn’t want
22:25
the illustrations done on a computer
22:26
they were done by hand
22:27
there’s a song Aloe Blacc the singer the
22:30
grammy-nominated singer
22:32
the book is called together is better
22:33
and gave me a song that goes with it and
22:35
it’s the music is at the back of the
22:37
book and it’s actually the lyrics are in
22:39
his handwriting actually his handwriting
22:41
and and here’s the best part the book is
22:45
scented we scented it with a custom
22:48
scent made by this amazing company
22:50
called 1229 and they designed for me the
22:52
scent of optimism so you smell the pages
22:57
and they smell like optimism
23:00
and the thing that I love about this is
23:02
I can’t do that in any a book format mmm
23:06
I wanted to create something that you
23:08
had to physically engage with and it’s
23:11
designed to be given as a gift the first
23:13
page says to from because I wanted it to
23:16
be given as a gift to someone you want
23:18
to say thank you for inspiring you or to
23:20
give to someone you wanted to inspire it
23:24
was designed to promote this physical
23:27
interaction and engaging with the real
23:29
world so I’m really proud of it it’s
23:31
incredible and super unique yeah it’s
23:34
fun I hope it does smashingly well as
23:36
your other books have and have given so
23:38
much to people and it’s just really
23:40
really been incredible and what you
23:41
shared with us today meant honestly
23:43
thank you absolutely one appreciate it
23:45
thank you very much thank you if you
23:51
want to change the world start off by
23:54
making your bed if you make your bed
23:57
every morning you will have accomplished
23:59
the first task of the day it will give
24:02
you a small sense of pride and it will
24:04
encourage you to do another task and
24:07
another and another and by the end of
24:10
the day that one task completed
24:11
will have turned into mini task
24:13
completed making your bed will also
24:15
reinforce the fact that the little
24:17
things in life matter if you can’t do
24:20
the little things right you’ll never be
24:22
able to do the big things right and if
24:24
by chance you have a miserable day you
24:27
will come home to a bed that is made
24:30
but you made and a maid bed gives you
24:34
encouragement that tomorrow will be
24:35
better to pass SEAL training there a
24:38
series of long swims that must be
24:39
completed one is the night swim before
24:43
the swim the instructors joyfully brief
24:44
the students on all the species of
24:47
sharks that inhabit the waters off San
24:50
Clemente they assure you however that no
24:54
student has ever been eaten by a shark
24:57
at least not that they can remember but
25:01
you are also taught that if a shark
25:04
begins to circle your position stand
25:06
your ground do not swim away
25:09
do not act afraid and if the shark
25:13
hungry for a midnight snack darts
25:15
towards you then summons up all your
25:17
strength and punch him in the snout and
25:20
you will turn and swim away there are a
25:23
lot of sharks in the world if you hope
25:26
to complete the swim you will have to
25:28
deal with them so if you want to change
25:31
the world don’t back down from the
25:34
Sharks over a few weeks of difficult
25:36
training my SEAL class which started
25:39
with 150 men was down to just 42 there
25:43
are now six boat crews of seven men each
25:45
I was in the boat with the tall guys but
25:49
the best boat crew we had was made up of
25:51
little guys the Munchkin crew we called
25:54
him no one was over five foot five the
25:57
Munchkin boat crew had one American
26:00
Indian one African American one Polish
26:02
American one Greek American one Italian
26:04
American and two tough kids from the
26:06
Midwest they out paddled out ran and out
26:10
swam all the other boat crews
26:12
big men and the other boat crews will
26:15
always make good-natured fun of the tiny
26:18
little flippers the munchkins put on
26:21
their tiny little feet prior to every
26:23
swim but somehow these little guys from
26:27
every corner of the nation in the world
26:28
always have the last laugh swimming
26:31
faster than everyone in reaching the
26:32
shore long before the rest of us
26:35
SEAL training was a great equalizer
26:37
nothing mattered but your will to
26:40
succeed not your color and not your
26:42
ethnic background not your education not
26:43
your social status if you want to change
26:46
the world measure a person by the size
26:48
of their heart not by the size of their
26:51
flippers the ninth week of training is
26:53
referred to as hell week it is six days
26:56
of no sleep constant physical and mental
26:59
harassment and one special day at the
27:02
mud flats the mud flats are an area
27:05
between San Diego and Tijuana where the
27:06
rough water runs off and creates the
27:08
Tijuana sloughs a swampy patch of
27:11
terrain where the mud will engulf you it
27:14
is on Wednesday of hell week but your
27:16
paddle down in the mud flats and spend
27:17
the next 15 hours trying to survive this
27:19
freezing cold the howling wind and the
27:23
incessant pressure to quit from the
27:24
instructors
27:25
as the Sun began to set that Wednesday
27:28
evening my training class having
27:30
committed some egregious infraction of
27:33
the rules it was ordered into the mud
27:35
the mud consumed each man till there was
27:38
nothing visible but our heads
27:41
the instructors told us we could leave
27:44
the mud if only five men would quit only
27:46
five minutes just five men and we could
27:49
get out of the oppressive cold looking
27:52
around the mud flat it was apparent that
27:53
some students were about to give up it
27:56
was still over eight hours till the Sun
27:57
came up eight more hours of
28:00
bone-chilling cold but shattering teeth
28:03
and shivering moans of the trainees were
28:05
so loud it was hard to hear anything and
28:08
then one voice began to echo through the
28:11
night one voice raised in song the song
28:16
was terribly out of tune but sung with
28:20
great enthusiasm one voice became two
28:23
and two became three and before long
28:25
everyone in the class was singing the
28:27
instructors threatened us with more time
28:29
in the mud if we kept up the singing but
28:31
the singing persisted and somehow the
28:34
mud seemed a little warmer
28:36
and the wind a little tamer and the dawn
28:38
not so far away if I have learned
28:41
anything in my time traveling the world
28:44
it is the power of hope the power of one
28:47
person the Washington a Lincoln King
28:50
Mandela and even a young girl from
28:53
Pakistan Malala one person can change
28:56
the world by giving people hope so if
28:59
you want to change the world start each
29:02
day with a task completed find someone
29:04
to help you through life respect
29:06
everyone know the life is not fair that
29:09
you will fail often but if you take some
29:11
risks step up on the time through the
29:14
toughest face down the bullies lift up
29:16
the downtrodden and never ever give up
29:18
if you do these things the next
29:21
generation and the generations that
29:23
follow will live in a world far better
29:25
than the one we have today and what
29:27
started here will indeed have changed
29:30
the world for the better
29:32
I got called nigger every day of my life
29:36
growing up lived in a small town the one
29:40
of the high ups in the KKK son sat
29:44
behind me in two classes so you called
29:45
me nigger long time I got my first car
29:48
they spray print nigga we’re going to
29:49
kill you on it and I was waiting like
29:51
297 pounds so I was just an insecure
29:55
scared kid but the best thing that
29:57
happened to me no one helped me I had to
30:00
figure out I wasn’t going to be a punk
30:03
kid all my life so the way I could turn
30:05
around was to suffer I had to build
30:09
calluses in my brain the same way I
30:12
built calluses on my hands so I broke
30:14
the Guinness Book of World Records for
30:15
pulse a long time ago but I felt at it
30:18
twice
30:18
and I did 67,000 pull-ups and trying to
30:22
break this record so to do four thousand
30:25
thirty pull-ups I had to do 67,000 for
30:29
training for that
30:30
and so what I realized is for me to
30:33
become the man I wanted to become I saw
30:35
myself as the weakest person God ever
30:37
created but I never blamed God for
30:40
anything you did to me so I wanted to
30:42
change that to be the hardest man ever
30:46
created in my that I don’t know but you
30:48
had to have a goal and my goal when I
30:50
was sitting there not going to school
30:52
being bullied being having no
30:55
self-esteem my goal was the only person
30:58
that’s gonna turn this person around
30:59
it’s me I was so driven and like I say
31:03
motivated cuz motivation is crap
31:04
motivation comes and goes when you’re
31:07
driven whatever’s in front of you will
31:10
get destroyed we live in an external
31:12
world everything is is you got to see it
31:15
touch its externally if you can for the
31:20
rest of your life live inside of
31:22
yourself you stop listening to people
31:24
who are calling you fat gay transsexual
31:26
nigger everything that is makes no sense
31:29
all these insecure people putting their
31:31
insecurities on you you gotta flush it
31:33
out you got to just be whoever the hell
31:35
God or whatever the hell you believe in
31:37
if you believe in nothing but yourself I
31:38
don’t care what it is you’re gonna take
31:40
everything and throw it away you have to
31:44
believe in one thing in that in yourself
31:46
and and I’m not saying don’t believe in
31:49
God or what you believe in but right now
31:51
for you to find greatness in yourself
31:54
you’re not gonna find it by looking in a
31:57
book or by even hearing me I may give
32:00
you the spark but you’ve got to go
32:03
inside yourself to find power that’s the
32:06
question how are you gonna do
32:07
taking your skin become more of a human
32:10
being don’t be afraid of the reflection
32:13
in the mirror that’s all you can be
32:15
afraid of once you overcome the
32:17
reflection in the mirror on the other
32:19
side is greatness that’s what people are
32:22
think by me running
32:24
I am countless in my mind I’m not
32:26
training for a race I’m training for
32:30
life I’m training for the time when I
32:32
get that two o’clock in the morning call
32:34
yeah my mom is dead or something happens
32:37
tragic in life I don’t fall I’m training
32:41
my mind and my body my spirit so it’s
32:43
all one so I can handle what life is
32:45
gonna throw at me because the life I’ve
32:47
lived that throws a whole bunch at you
32:50
and if you’re not physically immensely
32:52
prepared for that you’re just gonna
32:54
crumble and you’re good for nobody
32:56
in times of suffering what we do is we
32:58
forget how hard we really are okay
33:01
that’s what suffering is suffering is a
33:03
test it’s all this suffering is the true
33:05
test of life the beauty is remembering
33:08
this young dumb but people called nigger
33:11
is now where I’m at today and that is
33:16
when you finally get to that point for
33:18
me it’s forever lasting peace greatness
33:21
isn’t running towards miles at a time
33:24
I’m doing four thousand plus for being a
33:25
seal greatness is whatever the hell
33:28
you’ve dreamed of in your own mind you
33:30
got to first see it you got first create
33:32
this vision in your mind and then that’s
33:35
when I come into play once you create
33:37
this vision in your mind
33:39
is how am I going to get there now we
33:41
all we are all great no matter if
33:45
if you think you’re dumb I think you’re
33:47
fat the MAF you are fat or may have
33:49
you’ve been bullied or no matter if you
33:52
just got back from Iraq or Afghanistan
33:53
and you have no legs or your arms or
33:56
whatever man
33:57
we all have greatness it just you got to
34:00
find the courage you got to find the
34:02
courage to put your Bose headphones on
34:05
and silence the noise out of this world
34:08
and to find it
34:16
I’ll never forget standing there in my
34:18
bedroom it was dark it was cold it was
34:22
winter in Boston and for the first time
34:26
in three months I had beaten my habit
34:29
of hitting the snooze button there are
34:32
so many people in the world and and you
34:35
know you may be watching this right now
34:37
and you have these incredible ideas and
34:40
what you think is missing is motivation
34:42
and that’s not true because the way that
34:45
our minds are wired and the fact about
34:48
human beings is that we are not designed
34:51
to do things that are uncomfortable or
34:54
scary or difficult our brains are
34:57
designed to protect us from those things
35:00
because our brains are trying to keep us
35:01
alive and in order to change in order to
35:04
build a business in order to be the best
35:06
parent of a spouse to do all those
35:08
things that you know you want to do with
35:11
your life with your work with your
35:12
dreams you’re gonna have to do things
35:15
that are difficult uncertain or scary
35:18
which sets up this problem for all of us
35:20
you’re never going to feel like it
35:22
motivation is garbage you you only feel
35:25
motivated to do the things that are easy
35:28
right what do you think that is oh I
35:31
know exactly why that is because I’ve
35:33
studied this so much because for me one
35:36
of the hardest things to figure out was
35:38
why is it so hard to do the little
35:43
things that would improve my life and
35:46
what I’ve come to realize and what we’ll
35:49
talk a lot about today is that the way
35:51
that our minds are designed is our minds
35:54
are designed to stop you at all costs
35:58
from doing anything that might hurt you
36:02
and the way that that that that this all
36:05
happens is it all starts with something
36:07
super subtle that none of us ever catch
36:10
and that is with this habit that all of
36:13
us have that nobody’s talking about
36:15
we all have a habit of hesitating we
36:20
have an idea you’re sitting in a meeting
36:22
you have this incredible idea and
36:25
instead of just you know saying it you
36:29
stop and you hesitate
36:30
now what none of us realize is that when
36:32
you hesitate just that moment that micro
36:34
moment that small hesitation it sends a
36:37
stress signal to your brain it wakes
36:39
your brain up and your brain all of a
36:40
sudden goes oh wait a minute wait why is
36:42
he hesitating he didn’t hesitate when he
36:44
put on his killer spiky sneakers he
36:46
didn’t hesitate with the really cool
36:48
track pants he didn’t hesitate with the
36:49
NASA t-shirt now he’s hesitating to talk
36:51
something must be up so then your brain
36:53
goes to work to protect you it has a
36:55
million different ways to protect you
36:57
one of them is called the spotlight
36:59
effect it’s a known phenomenon where
37:01
your brain magnifies risk why to pull
37:04
you away from something that it
37:05
perceives to be a problem and so you can
37:09
truly trace every single problem or
37:12
complaint in your life to silence and
37:15
hesitation
37:16
those are decisions and what I do and
37:19
what’s changed my life is waking up and
37:22
realizing that motivations garbage I’m
37:24
never gonna feel like doing the things
37:26
that are tough for difficult or
37:27
uncertain or scary or know so I need to
37:29
stop waiting until I feel like it and
37:31
number two I am one decision away from a
37:35
totally different marriage a totally
37:37
different life a totally different job a
37:39
totally different income a totally
37:41
different relationship with my kids
37:44
not like one decision I’m divorcing you
37:47
in in the marriage example but one
37:50
decision on you know you could be having
37:52
a conversation with your spouse and you
37:54
feel your emotions rise up and within a
37:58
tiny window those emotions can take over
38:02
and can impact how your marriage goes or
38:05
you can learn how to take control of
38:09
that micro moment and make a decision to
38:12
act in a way that actually shifts your
38:14
marriage your life comes down to your
38:17
decisions and if you change your
38:19
decisions
38:20
you will change everything I was 41
38:23
years old I was unemployed my husband
38:27
had started a restaurant business which
38:30
was his dream this is actually a funny
38:32
story when he he got laid off from a big
38:35
job in high tech and I think he was
38:36
really relieved you know a lot of us
38:37
wait to quit our jobs and we get laid
38:39
off early and he said I’m not gonna look
38:42
for a job I’m gonna go into the
38:44
restaurant business and I think I said
38:45
the most famous lines of our marriage at
38:47
that point I looked at him and I said
38:48
listen buddy
38:50
inspiration is for strangers you get
38:53
your butt back to that job and you pay
38:55
the mortgage and again micro moment
38:58
where I’m being a jerk instead of being
39:00
a supportive wife but that’s an example
39:02
of where when he said he was not gonna
39:04
go get a job but he was gonna start a
39:06
business the first thing that was there
39:08
was fear and so fear was making the
39:11
decision for me I love that you can
39:13
share that though that’s so powerful
39:14
well so what happened is he the first
39:16
restaurant was a home run and of course
39:18
what do you do when things are
39:20
successful you grow it grow really big
39:22
and so they decided to raise some money
39:24
and we threw in our home equity line the
39:28
kids college savings they tried to open
39:31
a second and a third and at the same
39:32
point a grocery store chain encouraged
39:35
them to go into wholesale so it
39:36
basically got way too big way too fast
39:39
and the wheels started to come off and
39:41
they came off so badly that the second
39:44
restaurant failed and they held on to it
39:47
for too long like a lot of us do it’s
39:49
another trick our brains plan is called
39:51
sunk costs when you throw a ton of time
39:53
and a ton of money at something it’s
39:55
really hard to let go of it and if you
39:57
haven’t done it in business we all have
39:59
a relationship in our past stay way too
40:01
long
40:02
that was a trick your brain plan so by
40:06
the time that they closed the second
40:07
restaurant it was an $800,000 loss I
40:10
don’t I mean
40:12
that meant our entire home everyone
40:14
right it meant kids call I get just
40:18
choked up just thinking about how
40:19
terrifying it was and so I found myself
40:23
at the age of 41 like just feeling like
40:25
a complete failure and so did Chris and
40:29
to make it worse not only had we lost
40:33
all of our savings but so many friends
40:36
and family members had invested and so
40:38
there was this real tension between the
40:40
truth of what was happening and what you
40:43
had to do in public because it was
40:45
public business shame failure
40:47
embarrassment and the lien started to
40:50
hit the house the phone started to ring
40:52
and it was nothing but collection calls
40:54
and I just remember feeling this
40:58
tremendous shame and at some point I
41:01
think we all hit that moment in life
41:02
where things just are not going how you
41:05
thought they would go and and what’s
41:08
amazing about those moments is we all
41:11
respond very differently so my husband
41:14
he would spring out of bed and he would
41:17
head right out that door six o’clock in
41:19
the morning and he would go meet his
41:22
partner and they would go to the bank
41:23
and they would dig right in and they
41:24
would face their problems head-on and I
41:26
he’s also a smart guy I mean he did not
41:28
want to be in the house when yours truly
41:30
was because I was a Raging Bitch at that
41:33
point in our lives and the reason why is
41:35
because when you’re scared and you’re
41:37
afraid and you’re jealous and you’re
41:39
overwhelmed with emotion it is so much
41:42
easier to point a finger at other people
41:44
that’s a decision by the way sure one
41:46
you may not be aware that you’re making
41:48
but you’re still making it so what would
41:51
happen to me is the exact offices is
41:53
Chris would be gone the alarm would go
41:55
off at six o’clock in the morning and I
41:58
would lie there and I would think about
42:00
the lien on the house and I would think
42:02
about the bankruptcy that we were facing
42:05
and I would think about how much we had
42:08
fought the night before and I would
42:10
think about the fact that I was
42:11
unemployed
42:12
and I would get this news about and why
42:17
would you get up when your life is like
42:18
that why would you I mean I needed
42:22
confidence I needed courage I was so
42:25
tapped out and and you know it’s in the
42:28
scheme of life hitting the snooze button
42:30
is not that big of a deal but here’s the
42:33
thing about life
42:34
none of us wake up and say today is the
42:36
day I destroy my life what we do is we
42:40
kind of check out because it feels
42:43
overwhelming or we check out because
42:45
we’re afraid or we check out because we
42:47
start listening to self-doubt and then
42:49
we make these teeny tiny decisions we
42:54
don’t even realize it decision to not
42:56
get up on time a decision to not eat the
42:57
right thing a decision to snap at your
42:59
kids a decision to not speak in a
43:02
meeting with decision to not look for a
43:03
job a decision to not deal with your
43:05
finances a decision to not call your
43:07
parent like whatever it is all day long
43:10
these tiny decisions that take you so
43:12
far off track and then you wake up like
43:14
I didn’t and you you look at your life
43:16
and you think how the hell did I get
43:18
here and more importantly how do I get
43:20
back over there and you have no idea and
43:23
so I was so trapped and I know from your
43:27
story you felt the same way like you
43:29
knew that there was more in store for
43:31
you but you couldn’t figure out how you
43:33
close the gap how do you find the power
43:37
that say how do you discover your
43:39
greatness how do you solve these
43:40
problems it feels so overwhelming when
43:43
you can’t I mean I would go to the
43:45
grocery store and and the items would
43:48
scan and I would be sitting there
43:50
reading it my excuse because there was
43:53
no way that my check part was gonna
43:56
clear
43:57
so what I got in the struggle with
44:02
myself that a lot of us find ourselves
44:04
in and that is you get trapped in what I
44:08
call the knowledge action yet you know
44:11
what to do but you can’t seem to make
44:14
yourself do it right I mean every one of
44:17
us is one Google search away from a list
44:20
of instructions that if you follow any
44:23
of them it will change your life but how
44:26
do you get out of your head and stop
44:28
thinking about what you need to do and
44:30
actually do it and in my case this stuff
44:33
was pretty easy get up on time make
44:37
breakfast for the kids get them on the
44:39
bus
44:40
start looking for a job be nicer to
44:42
Chris don’t drink so much instead of
44:45
isolating yourself pick up the phone and
44:47
call a friend
44:48
get yourself out into the woods and go
44:50
for a walk start running again like all
44:53
these little things that I was capable
44:56
of but I couldn’t get out of here could
45:00
not get out of here and if you’re stuck
45:02
that’s the problem the problem is you’re
45:04
you’re in your head you’re thinking that
45:06
is the universal problem and it all
45:08
starts with this knowledge of what to do
45:11
and then you hesitate and you think
45:12
about whether or not you feel like doing
45:14
it so for a couple months I was I was
45:16
really stuck I would Chris would get up
45:18
at 6:00 I’d hit the snows and then I hit
45:20
the snooze and then a snooze the kids
45:22
would miss the bus and then every night
45:23
I’d do the same thing I’d go in bed have
45:25
you ever had one of those nights
45:27
probably before you started your company
45:29
but it where you going bed you’re like
45:32
all right Tom that’s it
45:33
tomorrow it’s the new me tomorrow
45:37
tomorrow I’m gonna get up on time I am
45:42
gonna go to the gym I am gonna look for
45:45
a job I’m not gonna drink so much it’s
45:47
gonna be amazing the new me the future
45:50
me Wow let’s do this right then you go
45:53
to bed and you wake up seven hours later
45:56
and you’re like I don’t know I mean it’s
45:59
the only whoo that’s a stupid at seat
46:00
motivations garbage it’s never there
46:02
when you need it ever ever ever ever
46:07
and so here’s what happened to me and
46:08
thank you for wearing the NASA t-shirt
46:10
it’s a really stupid story it’s a
46:12
powerful story so one night Chris have
46:15
gone to bed I’ve been struggling
46:17
struggling struggling we still had all
46:19
the same problems I we stalled a lien on
46:22
the house still facing bankruptcy still
46:24
fighting like crazy I was still
46:25
unemployed
46:27
he still they still hadn’t figured out
46:30
like the solution yet for the business
46:32
and I was about to turn off the TV and
46:35
there on the the TV there was this
46:37
rocket launching and I thought oh my
46:39
gosh like a rocket ship like NASA right
46:50
here and launch me out of that bed and
46:52
I’m going to move so fast that I don’t
46:54
think I’m gonna beat my brain now here’s
46:58
a really interesting point I talked a
47:02
lot about your instincts and inner
47:04
wisdom and we can get into this a little
47:08
bit later but a lot of us talk about the
47:10
fact that you have a gut feeling but
47:11
what all this research that I’ve done
47:13
for the book and all the speaking that I
47:15
do what I’ve discovered that’s
47:16
fascinating is actually when you set
47:19
goals when you have an intention on
47:20
something that you want to change about
47:22
your life your brain helps you what it
47:25
does is it opens up a checklist and then
47:28
your brain goes to work trying to remind
47:30
you of that intention that you said and
47:33
it’s really important to develop the
47:36
skill and I say that word purposefully
47:38
the skill of knowing how to hear that
47:41
inner wisdom and that intention kicking
47:43
in and leaning into it quickly
47:46
so for me my brain saying that’s it
47:48
right there
47:49
move as fast as a rocket melt I wanted
47:53
to change my life and I think most
47:55
people that are miserable or that are
47:57
that are really like dying to be great
48:00
and dying to have more we want to change
48:03
we want to live a better life
48:05
want to create more for our families we
48:07
want to be happier
48:09
the desire is there again it’s about how
48:12
do you go from knowledge to actions so
48:14
the first thing in the story that’s
48:16
important is realizing that the answer
48:18
was in me and my mind was telling me pay
48:21
attention I could have also been bourbon
48:23
[Laughter]
48:26
anyway the next morning the alarm goes
48:29
off and I pretended NASA was there
48:33
it’s a stupidest story I literally went
48:35
5 4 3 2 1 I counted out loud and then I
48:39
stood up and I’ll never forget standing
48:42
there in my bedroom it was dark it was
48:45
cold it was winter in Boston and for the
48:50
first time in 3 months I had beaten my
48:52
habit of hitting the snooze button I
48:56
couldn’t believe it and I thought wait a
48:58
minute counting backwards said it’s the
49:01
dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my
49:02
entire life well the next morning I used
49:04
it again and it worked the next morning
49:06
I used it again and it worked the next
49:08
morning I used it again and it worked
49:09
and then I started to notice something
49:11
really interesting there were moments
49:14
all day long all day long just like that
49:19
five-second moment in bed where I new
49:23
knowledge what I should do and if I
49:27
didn’t move within 5 seconds my brain
49:31
would step in and talk me out of it
49:33
every human being has a five-second
49:35
window might even be shorter for you you
49:39
have about a five-second window in which
49:41
you can move from idea to action before
49:44
your brain kicks into full gear and
49:47
sabotages any change in behavior because
49:51
remember your brain is wired to stop you
49:53
from doing things that are uncomfortable
49:54
or uncertain or scary
49:57
it’s your job to learn how to move from
50:00
those ideas that could change everything
50:03
into acting on in the smallest moment
50:06
for anyone right now at home who’s
50:09
thinking like this sounds too simple too
50:11
easy talk a bit about your community
50:13
because reading some of their comments
50:15
it is it’s crazy how many people like
50:19
the sheer volume of people you quote in
50:20
your book but if you also go online and
50:22
just look at the people that are like
50:23
directly reaching out to you it it is an
50:26
avalanche of people that have stories
50:29
around the five-second rule well one of
50:30
the reasons why I’m so excited about
50:32
this book and look you don’t have to buy
50:34
the book this is an idea that you can
50:35
use it’s free it’s backed by science
50:38
more than eight million people around
50:40
the world have discovered it and you
50:42
know you’re talking about the number of
50:43
people we’ve heard from more than a
50:44
hundred thousand people in 80 countries
50:47
they were using this rule we know of 11
50:49
people who have stopped themselves from
50:51
killing themselves using this for us I
50:53
saw one of those yes yes there’s a guy
50:56
Steve that wrote to us who was a veteran
50:57
he was suffering from post-traumatic
50:59
stress disorder he boarded a ferry
51:02
overseas with the intention to jump over
51:05
he walked over to the railing and his
51:09
inner wisdom kicked in
51:14
in that moment the five-second rule five
51:17
four three two one counting backwards
51:19
moved away from the railing asked for
51:22
help saved his life
51:23
his story has inspired countless other
51:25
people that have heard me in the
51:27
speeches that I give around the world
51:29
about this one tool and so you know the
51:32
thing the thing that’s so cool about
51:34
this and I should tell you the science
51:35
behind it because I’m gonna be honest
51:37
with you it is stupid had I ever thought
51:40
that I would find myself eight years
51:43
after discovering it spending my days
51:46
telling people about the five-second
51:48
rule first of all I would have picked a
51:50
different name because it reminds you of
51:51
the one where you have to like pick up
51:52
food within 5 seconds off the floor
51:54
right it was my secret weapon this was
51:59
something I did I never intended to tell
52:02
anybody because I went from getting up
52:04
on time and waking up on time to shaking
52:06
up my entire life
52:07
because when you understand the power of
52:09
a 5 second decision and you understand
52:12
that you always have a choice to go from
52:14
autopilot to decision-maker everything
52:17
in your life will change you will be a
52:18
different negotiator
52:20
you will be different sales you will be
52:22
unstoppable in the gym because you will
52:24
realize the amount of garbage that you
52:27
put in the way of your hopes of your
52:30
dreams of your potential of your
52:31
confidence of your courage everything
52:34
comes down to the decisions that you
52:36
make we all know what to do none of us
52:40
know how to make ourselves do it so I
52:42
started researching it why does
52:45
something so stupid work why why does
52:48
something so silly create such powerful
52:51
and profound change well here’s why the
52:54
rule is a form of metacognition
52:56
metacognition is a fancy-pants terms
52:59
that means something real simple you can
53:02
outsmart your own brain in furtherance
53:05
of goals they’re tricks that you can use
53:08
that actually outsmart the tricks your
53:11
brain plays on you
53:12
in furtherance of a higher purpose we
53:15
all know this you can you can restrain
53:18
yourself if you’re in a situation that
53:22
calls for it you can jump into a raging
53:24
river to save your dog or your kid you
53:27
can direct yourself in ways if it’s
53:31
important to you and so the rule what it
53:34
does is it does something really
53:35
remarkable when you count backwards 5 4
53:38
3 2 1 what you’re actually doing is
53:42
you’re interrupting what researchers
53:44
call habit loops that get encoded as as
53:48
closed loop patterns in your basal
53:50
ganglia that’s the part of the brain
53:51
where your feelings or your emotions
53:53
every habit that you have which is
53:54
nothing more than behavior that you
53:56
repeat that you don’t even think of it I
53:58
don’t refer to as a gearbox yeah shift
54:01
your attention yes and so when you go 5
54:04
4 3 2 1 it interrupts what’s going on
54:06
here that’s spinning without you
54:07
thinking and it moves and awakens your
54:11
prefrontal cortex so when you hit one
54:14
your habit has been interrupted so
54:17
you’ve interrupted self-doubt you’ve
54:19
interrupted
54:19
maybe snapping at your kids you’ve
54:21
interrupted the desire to grab for a
54:23
drink you’ve interrupted procrastination
54:27
you’ve also by counting backwards done
54:30
an action it’s awakened your prefrontal
54:33
cortex that is the part of the brain
54:35
that you need that’s awake when you’re
54:37
changing behavior when you’re learning
54:39
new things when you hit one it’s also a
54:41
prompt so in the language of research
54:44
you’ll hear people talk about starting
54:47
rituals that is that is something that’s
54:50
proven to help you learn a new habit the
54:52
five-second rule when you repeat it
54:53
becomes a starting ritual that triggers
54:56
you to act with confidence that triggers
54:58
you that this is a moment for courage
54:59
that triggers you to shift gears and
55:02
because you’ve also done the manual work
55:04
of awakening the part of the brain that
55:06
you need
55:06
change you’ve set yourself up for
55:09
success it doesn’t work if you count up
55:11
because you can keep going and also
55:13
counting up does it require folks if you
55:16
count backwards five four three two one
55:17
It Again awakens some prefrontal cortex
55:20
and it prompts you to move when you
55:23
start to use it and then you read about
55:24
it you’ll see that that it’s being used
55:26
all over the place they use it in the
55:28
armed services in order to align troops
55:30
and get them to start an exercise they
55:32
use it at elementary schools five four
55:33
three two one at big assemblies to get a
55:35
huge roomful of kids to stop talking
55:37
simple and interesting example yeah
55:39
because it requires you to focus it’s
55:43
not a habit it will become a habit that
55:45
prompts you to have confidence courage
55:47
but in the beginning it interrupts
55:49
patterns of behavior that you do on
55:51
autopilot it helps you assert control
55:53
and it teaches you how to become the
55:56
kind of person that moves from thinking
55:58
about something to actually at the same
56:06
time and I lived through tragedies and
56:09
controversies and people look down on me
56:11
put me down because I didn’t look like
56:12
them I look stronger I’ve had people
56:16
look past me because of the color of my
56:17
skin
56:18
I’ve had people overlook me because I
56:20
was a woman I had critics say I will
56:23
never win another Grand Slam when I was
56:25
only at number seven and now here I
56:27
stand today blue 21 Grand Slam titles
56:29
and I’m still going and I cannot help
56:32
but think of my favorite poet Maya
56:34
Angelou and she has this poem call
56:37
still I rise so here it goes you may
56:39
write me down in history with your
56:41
bitter twisted lies it may try me with
56:44
the very dirt but still like dust I rise
56:48
just like moving and Suns with the
56:50
certainty of tithes just like hopes in
56:52
springing high still I rise
56:55
did you want to see me broken bowed head
56:58
and Lord eyes shoulders falling like
57:01
teardrops weakened by my soulful cries
57:04
out of the huts of history’s shame I
57:07
rise from a past that’s rooted in pain I
57:10
rise into the daybreak that’s
57:13
wonderfully clear I rise
57:15
bringing the gifts that my ancestors
57:17
gave arrives I am the dream and the hope
57:21
of the slave all right I rise I rise
57:28
your need for acceptance can make you
57:30
invisible in this world like many of you
57:34
I was concerned about going out into the
57:37
world and doing something bigger than
57:39
myself until someone smarter than myself
57:42
made me realize that there is nothing
57:44
bigger than myself
57:45
don’t let anything stand in the way of
57:48
the light that shines through this form
57:50
risk being seen in all of your glory our
57:55
eyes are not viewers
57:57
they’re also projectors that are running
58:00
a second story over the picture that we
58:02
see in front of us all the time
58:03
fear is writing that script and the
58:06
working title is I’ll never be enough
58:08
and your whole life imagining ghosts
58:11
worrying about the pathway to the future
58:13
but all there will ever be is what’s
58:16
happening here in the decisions we make
58:19
in this moment which are based in either
58:21
love or fear so many of us choose our
58:25
path out of fear disguised as
58:26
practicality
58:29
what we really want seems impossibly out
58:31
of reach and ridiculous to expect so we
58:33
never dare to ask the universe for it
58:35
I’m saying I’m the proof that you can
58:39
ask the universe for it
58:42
I realized one night in LA that the
58:44
purpose of my life had always been to
58:47
free people from concern just like my
58:49
dad
58:50
I did something
58:52
that made people present their best
58:55
selves to me wherever I go
58:58
how will you serve the world what do
59:01
they need that your talent can provide
59:04
that’s all you have to figure out I can
59:07
tell you from experience the effect you
59:09
have on others is the most valuable
59:10
currency there is
59:13
even fail at what you don’t want so you
59:16
might as well take a chance on doing
59:18
what you love relax and dream up a good
59:21
life this is the most important and
59:27
crucial period of your lives for what
59:30
you do now and what you decide now at
59:33
this age may well determine which way
59:37
your life shall go and the question is
59:39
whether you have a proper a solid and a
59:44
sound blueprint and I would have suggest
59:47
some of the things that should be in
59:50
your life’s blueprint number one in your
59:54
life’s blueprint should be a deep belief
59:59
in your own dignity your own Worth and
60:03
your own somebodies don’t allow anybody
60:06
to make you feel that you are nobody
60:10
always feel that you count always feel
60:14
that you have Worth and always feel that
60:17
your life has ultimate significance the
60:22
second layer
60:23
in your life’s blueprint you must have
60:27
as a basic principle the determination
60:30
to achieve excellence in your various
60:34
fields of endeavor you’re going to be
60:37
deciding as the days and the years
60:39
unfold what you will do in life what
60:41
your life’s work will be once you
60:44
discover what it will be set out to do
60:47
it
60:47
and to do it well be a bush if you can’t
60:50
be a tree if you can’t be a highway just
60:52
be a trail if you can’t be the Sun be a
60:54
star for visit by size that you win or
60:57
you fail
61:03
panel and your last blueprint must be a
61:07
commitment to the eternal principles of
61:12
beauty love
61:15
and justice
61:17
well life with none of us has been a
61:19
crystal style we must keep moving we
61:22
must keep going if you can’t fly run
61:26
if you can’t run walk if you can’t walk
61:29
crawl but by all means keep moving

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