Today’s story shows how
My experience is still on-going but I needed to come and give thanks for the journey so far.
My primary focus has been on my weight. When I first read The Secret about 3 years ago, I tried to use it, but it didn’t work. I have been on the roller coaster of weight struggle for about 11 years because I used to be skinny but when I added a little weight, people made a big deal about it and I believed it, until it became me.
Fast forward to now, the last time I had checked my weight, I weighed 121 kg which was very upsetting and I decided that this year was going to be the last year that I struggle with my weight. In sympathy, my boss gave me money to register for the first month of a gym membership and I went religiously. I would wake up by 5:30, get to the gym by 7 am, work out for one hour and get to work by 8. I did this for 3 months but no difference. All this while, I was eating like a bird, eating rations not even enough for a child.
One good weekend my boyfriend, who is as skinny as a rake, came to see me and we got talking, and I told him why I get so infuriated when someone makes a comment about my weight or about food. He told me that I should get the “not” mentality out of my head, that he never thinks of adding or losing weight and that he just eats to enjoy the food.
At that point I remembered The Secret and I realized that maybe if I try it, it will work. So I started consciously eating. I would fill my plate and before I ate I would bless the food and thank God for the gift of food, praying that it nourishes my body, and then I would eat.
Most of the time I have gone only half way before I got full, and surprisingly, it was not difficult leaving the remaining food on my plate, unlike before when I had a compulsion to eat everything on my plate. I noticed that I no longer have cravings, I eat when I want to eat and what I want to eat. But the beautiful thing is that I eat only when I am hungry. I do not obsess about what I am going to eat or whether by anyone’s standard it is fatty or not. I just eat.
I wrote on my bathroom wall the things I am grateful for, and when I read it, I imagine my self being and doing them. For example, wearing a trouser and a corporate shirt and tucking in my shirt into by trouser Oh! Bliss!
And guess what?!
Since “the talk”, which was almost a month ago, I have gone to the gym less than 5 times. I now see the gym as a place of fun, to energize and strengthen my body, not a place of weight loss. So now, when I go, I enjoy the workouts and the feeling afterwards.
So far, so many people have started commenting on the fact that I am looking thinner! The best one was when one of my clients said that I have lost so much weight that I should take it easy so that I do not hurt myself. I relished the compliment and soaked it in but I was laughing because I am not doing anything!
I had to write my story so far, because this is only the beginning. I already feel myself at 75 kg, I can see it and I can see how beautiful I will look in my wedding gown at my perfect weight!!!