Many of us, as we were growing up, learned to ignore our inner experience and instead we learned to focus on others. Our ego wounded self learned to tune into what others were feeling in the hopes of having control over feeling safe.

Where you put your focus depends upon on what you believe makes you feel happy and safe. If you believe that your happiness and safety come from others liking you, connecting with you, approving of you, loving you, or spending time with you, then your focus is likely to be on others.

If you believe that your happiness and safety come from connecting with yourself and with your higher guidance, and from approving of yourself, defining your own worth, spending time with yourself, taking loving action for yourself, and sharing your love and caring with others, then your focus is likely to be within. In other words, if you believe your happiness and safety come from getting love, your focus will be on others. If you believe your happiness and safety come from being loving with yourself and others, your focus will be within.

Focus On Yourself And Not Others (One of the Best Speeches Ever)

Transcript of the Video:

00:00
there will be days where you will ask
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yourself where is all this going what is
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the purpose what is my purpose
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in high school I thought I’d discover my
00:16
life’s purpose when I could answer that
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age-old question what do you want to be
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when you grow up
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no in college I thought I would discover
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it when I could answer what’s your major
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not quiet
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I thought that maybe I discover it when
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I found a good job then I thought I just
00:35
needed to get a few promotions that
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didn’t work either
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I kept convincing myself that it was
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just over the horizon around the next
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corner nothing worked and it was really
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tearing me apart part of me kept pushing
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ahead to the next achievement and the
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other part kept asking is this all there
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is
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I’ve often said that I wished people
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could realize all their dreams and
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wealth and fame and so that they could
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see that it’s not where you’re gonna
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find your sense of completion I realized
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one night in LA that the purpose of my
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life had always been to free people from
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concern I can tell you from experience
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the effect you have on others is the
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most valuable currency there is when you
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work towards something greater than
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yourself you find meaning you find
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purpose when you keep people at the
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center of what you do it can have an
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enormous impact all life is interrelated
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we are all bound together into a single
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garment of destiny
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but under the sky under the heaven man
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there is but one family it’s also happen
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then that people like your food
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that’s the only thing that’s important
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really letting each other know we’re
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here reminding each other that we’re
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part of a larger self deep inside of you
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lives a hero who wants to do something
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great with your life who wants to
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inspire other people who wants to do
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creative work who wants to change the
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world maybe are so numbed out that
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you’ve forgotten who you truly are to
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the fact that you are alive today means
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there is a mighty call on your life to
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do something with the rest of your life
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when your condensed that your cause is
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riled have the courage to take a stand
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use your minds and hands and your hearts
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to build something bigger than
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yourselves if you see a problem or an
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injustice recognize that no one will fix
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it but you a change in the world that
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seems so clear that you are sure someone
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else is going to do it but they’re not
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you will ideas don’t come out fully
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formed they only become clear as you
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work on them you just have to get
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started how will you serve the world
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what do they need that your talent can
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provide that’s all you have to figure
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out
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I want to do good I want the world to be
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better because I was here I want my life
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I want my my work I want it to mean
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something if you are not making someone
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else’s life better then you’re wasting
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your time
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when you wake up in the morning and your
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life means something to somebody other
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than you that you have a purpose if you
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don’t go do the things that you’re gonna
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do people’s lives will suffer to live in
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service not to you but to live in
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service to humanity to live in service
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to your family to church to your city to
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your country to the world that is the
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purest form joy tear down that mirror
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that makes you always look at yourself
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and you will be able to look beyond that
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mural and you will see the millions of
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people that need your help reaching out
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and helping people who bring you more
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satisfaction than anything else you have
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ever done measure your impact on
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humanity not in lies but in the lives
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you touch not in popularity but in the
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people you serve there is so much out
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there conspiring to make you cynical
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people will try to convince you that you
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should keep your empathy out of your
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career
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don’t let that noise knock you off
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course I found that my life got bigger
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when I stopped caring what other people
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thought about me yours will to stay
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focused on what really matters
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when I look around I always learn
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something from that it to be always
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yourself and to express yourself to have
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faith in yourself to express oneself
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honestly not lying to oneself and to
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express myself honestly know that my
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friend is telling how to do everything
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you gain in life will rot and fall apart
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and all that will be left of you is what
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was in your heart don’t let anything
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stand in the way of the light that
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shines through this form risk being seen
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in all of your glory you are ready and
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able to do beautiful things in this
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world you will only ever have two
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choices love or fear choose love and
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don’t ever let fear turn you against
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your playful heart can contribute to our
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not approving our dreams so I’m not
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feeling good enough a lot of things can
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contribute to that many of us never live
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up to our potential or don’t approve
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ourselves because we’ve never had
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anybody to believe in us looking at some
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of the things that keep us from
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approving ourselves that we’ve all done
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some things and we don’t feel good about
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things that if we had to do those things
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over again we would not do those things
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or we would do things differently so
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part of what we must do in order to
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begin to move into your greatness you
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got to remove a major energy block and
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that is dealing with the issue of
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forgiveness people that have hurt you
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someone who’s done you wrong make a list
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and things that you have done that you
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you feel bad about that you regret make
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a list
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there may be a time when you weren’t a
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good father a good mother a good brother
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a sister or you you were a bad shallow
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you didn’t do a good job or you lied or
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you were just honest so you stole no one
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knows this but you or something you feel
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good about so you know it’s a real dog
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in me to do that
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something you just really regrets and we
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make a list of all those things all of
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us have some of that might say there is
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some good and the worst of us and some
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bad and the best of us so none of us
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escape now here’s something I want you
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to do I want you to become involved in
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an active process to get some clutter
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out of your life so if there’s any area
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in your life that you need to clean up
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there’s some people whose cluttering up
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your life they serve no purpose
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whatsoever they’re just holding and
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occupying the space that somebody useful
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positive nurturing and contributing
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could be holding that space you’ll even
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have time to look to see what else is
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out there because you all have all of
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these people surrounding you that’s not
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in enabling you to grow so look at what
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is it I need to get out of my life just
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start cleaning this stuff out see
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whatever you have in your environment is
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a reflection of your consciousness so
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you got all that chaos there that
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represents some disorganized cluttered
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section of your mind so let’s get all
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this out of there all right work to get
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that out clean that up anybody that you
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feel very strongly about have some
08:35
negative feelings about let’s look at
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some good reasons to forgive them number
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one you must try and see what has
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happened or see things from that other
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person’s point of view if look at it
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from their point of view that’s that’s
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one area that’s number one then number
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two holding a grudge hurts you it
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doesn’t hurt them so just for good
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health and peace of mind let it go any
09:02
feeling of the resentment of anger or
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hatred is called to me the load of
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bitterness within every thought that we
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entertain produces a chemical in our
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brain that impacts the body’s immune
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system and besides this person you are
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hating it probably I’m not even aware of
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it don’t even know you are really hating
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them you’ve turned up the steam loan
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from this life to hate intensely and
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here you are killing yourself making
09:32
yourself vulnerable to various types of
09:34
illnesses putting yourself in bad health
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and I say that person is not worth your
09:40
sacrificing your health or one minute of
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peace of mind one minute of anger robs
09:45
you of 60 seconds of happiness so decide
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it doesn’t matter let it go and
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experience the dignity and the
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magnanimous sense of character of being
10:01
big enough to move on and get on with
10:03
your life letting it go so you can grow
10:07
see what all of us have greatness within
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us but when you don’t come to grips with
10:13
your greatness and you don’t work to
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develop it if you’re not seeking it out
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if you’re not finding where it is if
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you’re not trying to locate it if you’re
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not experimenting with your life to try
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and find out what’s fits for you I’m
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saying that you’re positioning yourself
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to be a miserable person an unfulfilled
10:30
person how else do we do it
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procrastination we just put things off
10:37
over and over and over again why because
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we haven’t accepted it we don’t feel
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deserving we don’t feel that we’re good
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enough so we sabotage ourselves by not
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ever taking care of business we get real
10:50
busy doing a lot of things what we don’t
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have anytime we start doing so many
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things we just give our time away until
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we don’t have any time for ourselves or
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any time to do the things that we want
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to do and every time you put it off and
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move it back well I’ll do it one day all
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year I’m gonna get to it I’m saying to
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you that one day you look around
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and there goes the year there goes two
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years there goes three years so there’s
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something you want to do do it now do it
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right now
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don’t put it off start right now where
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you are there will never be a perfect
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ideal time whatever you have going for
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you right now that’s enough work on that
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idea work on it work on it work on it
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watch out with the relationships you
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have what kind of person are you
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becoming because of the relationships
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that you have right now do those people
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contribute to you do they help you grow
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and develop yourself what kind of person
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are you becoming people who have not
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accept greatness for themselves these
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people don’t study ladies and gentlemen
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these people don’t study they don’t have
11:46
time for personal growth and development
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then have time to work on their minds
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know they’ll have time for that too busy
11:52
for that to determine the height of your
11:54
self approval it’s important that you
11:56
evaluate yourself because you know you
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quite well but it’s almost impossible to
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do it totally by yourself you must get
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some caring feedback find somebody close
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enough to you that has observed you of
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it around you that you value their
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opinion and ask them how do they see you
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how do they rate you in terms of your
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self esteem and then compare what you
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have with what they say see there are
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things many times that people can see in
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us that we can’t see because it’s a
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blind spot when someone pays you a
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compliment can you handle it well can
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you handle compliment slow that’s a good
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barometer about your self-esteem can you
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handle criticism well can you give
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criticism what are your expectations
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what do you expect to get from life what
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do you expect to get from your business
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what do you expect to get from your
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relationships what is your ideal day
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what is it that you expect from this
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experience this trip this journey that
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you’re involved in
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people that that have a strong sense of
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self approval they have high
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expectations for themselves and from
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life and from others see a lot of people
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don’t expect much from life so they
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don’t shoot for much they’re not
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preparing for much a lot of people just
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showing up in life a lot of people just
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get up in the morning and they go
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through the day they go to the job just
13:30
to pull a check down watching the clock
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coming here so you want to be a
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different kind of person as you forward
13:39
your life you want to get something out
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of this if you’re going to do it it’s
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worth your time your energy you’ve got
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some expectations from this so examine
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your expectations versus your wishes
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some people wish they could do better
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but some people expect to do that
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were you on that I love yourself make
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caring for you the highest priority in
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your life take care of you look out for
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what truly satisfies you we’re not
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taught to love ourselves we’re not
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taught to look out for ourselves we’re
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not taught to take care of ourselves to
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become sensitive to our wants to our
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needs our desires so make a conscious
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effort make you number one priority your
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peace of mind your health is more
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important than your family in any and
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everybody because if you don’t have
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peace of mind if you don’t have your
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health you can’t serve anybody don’t
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neglect yourself a lot of us in
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particularly ladies have been groomed to
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be sacrificial lambs putting their
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dreams on the back burner in deference
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to their children’s dreams or their
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husband’s dreams or their family’s
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dreams and forget about themselves then
14:55
become resentful and angry and bitter so
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start taking care of yourself looking
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out for you develop a health plan your
15:05
help is all you got so start taking care
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of you eating nutritious meals willing
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to exercise
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your body taking care of this body
15:14
loving yourself so do some good stuff
15:18
for yourself on purpose take some time
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out for you you can’t develop and
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manifest your greatness you can’t be a
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high achiever if you don’t feel good you
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don’t take care of yourself it takes the
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edge off your life it helps you to
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manage things rather than allowing them
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to manage you gives you more personal
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power to deal with stuff take care of
15:40
you
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now here’s something else I suggest for
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you become aware of what your needs are
15:47
and develop compassion towards yourself
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despite your human defense develop
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compassion for yourself despite your
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human defense you will never be perfect
16:02
hello you will never be perfect you’re
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human you’ve made a lot of mistakes
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you’ve done a lot of dumb stupid things
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guess what you’re not through yet you
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gotta learn to be gentle with yourself
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make it alright what you don’t know
16:22
mistakes that you make it’s okay
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handle it learn from the experience
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decide that you are going to whatever
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you become involved in to be upfront to
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be true to yourself are you getting what
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you need out of it
16:40
and be upfront with people and tell them
16:42
what you need from them don’t assume
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that they know don’t say I thought you
16:48
knew
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no tell people upfront here’s what I
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need from this in order for this to work
16:53
for me be upfront with your stuff
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tell them upfront so they are not
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surprised later on so your feelings
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aren’t hurt later on see if they tell
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you upfront they can’t do it now you
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know you can keep on stepping
17:08
but tell people upfront here’s what I
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want in order for me to play this game
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with you if we’re going to dance this is
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what I got to get out of it see if you
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don’t take care of your needs guess what
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you will always have that nagging song
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in the back of your mind say well when
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do I get mine see we’re taught to be
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quiet and not speak up for ourselves not
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to be selfish if you don’t take care of
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you what do you think is going to take
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care of you who’s gonna look out for you
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better than you will no one’s gonna do
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that you got a business no one’s gonna
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take care of your business better than
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you nobody nobody anything you want to
17:47
do in life you’ve got to take ownership
17:49
of it so hey I’m gonna make this happen
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be willing to venture out and do
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something that you have fantasized about
17:55
doing and you know you probably won’t be
17:59
good at it but do it anyhow